I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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