I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
