ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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