I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
