Is it because I queefed?
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
