i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Randomize
