party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
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