I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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