need another drink. this is the easiest way
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
