Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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