Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Randomize
