well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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