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uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
