Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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