i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Sorry about my life...
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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