Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
