i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
