I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I understand Curling. That high.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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