No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I need to calm my uterus...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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