Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
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