Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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