And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I don't think brook has ever known best
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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