ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize