therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
