i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
