brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Randomize