I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
Randomize
