I'd wear matching sweaters with you
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
