You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
