...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
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