I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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