that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
