i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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