u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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