Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
