Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
