there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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