im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Sext me about skeletons
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
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