After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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