So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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