I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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