I bet he comes in French.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
