Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
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I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
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A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.