You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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