hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize