The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
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