God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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