Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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