Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Randomize
