and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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