We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Randomize
